This week was the annual Junior League Black Tie Turtle Derby. Held at the Rammer Jammer, it was attended by many and was an overall successful event. Slow Bob, Mayor Hayes’ turtle, defeated Delia Ann Lee’s Margaret Mitchell in a nail biter. Congrats, Slow Bob. I guess. Now, I really don’t want to start any drama. Honestly, my Beat Blog is all about reporting the happenings and going ons around BlueBell. It’s not supposed to start controversy. However, it’d be remiss of me not to bring up how much I dislike the turtle derby. Year after year, I can’t help but think how it’s fairly inhumane to subject these reptiles to these conditions. It must be beyond frightening for the poor animals. Having to be put into a box with huge lights shining on them and rowdy BlueBellians (obviously drunk since there’s an open bar) screaming at them. How scary! I know the turtles’ owners are good people and only want the best for their pets, but when it comes to a competition, sometimes people do the craziest of things to win. Clearly, the derby is here to stay. I mean it is for charity after all. So that’s a plus. Kind of. But I just hope in the future we could make the environment a little better for the turtles. Perhaps play soothing music and use candles instead of spotlights. And how about we make people keep their voices down (i.e. serve non-alcoholic beverages)? That way the turtles will feel safe and not traumatized. Since turtles can’t speak, someone has to give them a voice, right?