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[Scene opens to the gatehouse, Wade's home.]

[Shower starts.]

Wade Kinsella: Who the...? [Notices dress.] Uh-oh.

[Scene shifts to kitchen of Mayor's Plantation.]

Zoe Hart: George knows. Months of keeping the big secret, and now, ka-bam, it's exploded. Who know's what the fallout's gonna be? All the Belles could be wearing black.

Lavon Hayes: Yeah, well all I know is I blew it. Kissing Lemon in public. Monumentally stupid. And George Tucker...

Zoe Hart: Poor George. Yeah. [Punches Lavon.]

Lavon Hayes: What are you doing?

Zoe Hart: George is hurt and angry. He already lashed out at me. It's obvious that you will be the next target. I just want you to be prepared. [Punches Lavon again.]

Lavon Hayes: Okay, you know I got hit by 350-pound linemen for a living, right?

Zoe Hart: Mm-hmm.

Lavon Hayes: Those little jabs are just like butterflies dancing on my chest. And no offense to George, not exactly afraid of his right hook, either. Though he's got a right to try.

Zoe Hart: I'm gonna go to the Rammer Jammer and do some recon. Find out what everyone's saying about the big breakup. You should probably lay low until I report back.

Wade Kinsella: Hey, uh, I need y'all's help.

Zoe Hart: Why would I help you? Why would I help anyone? I am a shallow snob, remember? Move out of my way.

Wade Kinsella: Ow. Lavon...

Lavon Hayes: Wait, write it down... If you do your laundry once a week, you won't have to borrow my socks.

Wade Kinsella: Yeah, or your underwear.

Lavon Hayes: My what now?

Wade Kinsella: Look, it doesn't matter. Point is there's an emergency, all right? Last night, regrettably, I got very drunk, and uh, I slept with someone.

Lavon Hayes: So, that happens all the time.

Wade Kinsella: Well, I can't remember who.

Lavon Hayes: And that happens most of the time.

Wade Kinsella: Yeah, but none of my other overnight guests wear things like this.

Lavon Hayes: That is a large garment.

Wade Kinsella: She's in my shower right now.

Lavon Hayes: Are you sure she could fit in your shower?

Wade Kinsella: What are we gonna do?

Lavon Hayes: You are gonna head back home and meet your new girlfriend. Bring her a donut.

Wade Kinsella: Come with me. Please.

Lavon Hayes: Go.

Wade Kinsella: You are a good friend. Thank you, thank you so much.

Lavon Hayes: You made your bed. Hope she didn't break it.

[Scene shifts to Rammer Jammer. A capella group sings.]

Zoe Hart: Hey, Shelsters, wh-what's going on, huh? Any news? Any gossip?

Shelley Ng: Debbie Jean Fordham got laryngitis and can't perform on Dash DeWitt's charity revue "Gilbert and South-ivan" tomorrow.

Zoe Hart: Gilbert and South-ivan? And that's the gossip? The only gossip?

Shelley Ng: Sorry, geez.

Zoe Hart: Hey, Brick. How you holding up?

Brick Breeland: What do you think? I am so furious I can't even see straight.

Zoe Hart: I'm sorry, I heard. But after a while this anger will pass, won't it?

Brick Breeland: No it won't, not before I have to get up and sing tomorrow night.

Zoe Hart: Sing?

Brick Breeland: Do you know how many words there are in "I Am a Very Mode of a Modern Major General"? There's ten in the title alone! I can't believe I let Dash convince me to sign up for this!

Zoe Hart: Right. Dash. Now he is always causing trouble.

[Scene shifts to the Breeland home.]

Magnolia Breeland: I still don't understand. How is this cake gonna make George un-break up with you?

Lemon Breeland: Oh, he didn't break up with me. He was angry, and he lashed out, but he didn't mean it.

Magnolia Breeland: And how do you know?

Lemon Breeland: See this?

Magnolia Breeland: Mm-hmm.

Lemon Breeland: Zero calls, you know why? Because George has not told anyone. Not even a single soul. Had he even insinuated that we were fightng, that phone would be ringing off the hook with people wanting in on the gossip.

Magnolia Breeland: Maybe he hasn't had a chance to tell anyone. It just happened.

Lemon Breeland: Maybe. But until then, I have hopes that he will reconsider. So this morning I am bringing him his favorite cake, and I'm going to apologize.

Magnolia Breeland: What's he so angry about anyway? I never heard what you guys were fighting about.

Lemon Breeland: It's not important. Because all today and all tomorrow, during Dash's revue, I'm going to apologize. And I will no stop, and eventually, he will have to forgive me.

[Scene shifts to the gatehouse.]

Wade Kinsella: Uh, hello?

Tom Long: Hey, Wade.


[Wade screams.]

[Tom screams.]

Tom Long: Why are we screaming?

Wade Kinsella: What are you doing here?

Tom Long: Don't you remember?

Wade Kinsella: I wouldn't be asking, Tom, if I remembered.

Tom Long: I found you last night walking on the side of the road. You were drunk as a skunk, so I brought you back here, and I was tired, so I slept over.

Wade Kinsella: In my bed?

Tom Long: The couch was itchy. Don't worry, we slept feet to head.

Wade Kinsella: Eh, some things are best forgot. Tom, uh, can you tell me whose shirt this is? Maybe what I was doing by the side of the road?

Tom Long: I have no idea. This is intriguing.

Wade Kinsella: And where's my car, Tom?

Tom Long: You lost your car? Aw, man, this is just like The Hangover! Which is awesome, because it's exactly like The Hangover 2. There might be a tiger in your closet.

[Scene shifts to kitchen of Mayor's Plantation.]

Zoe Hart: I'm going over there. He needs a friend.

Lavon Hayes: A friend? He's not even speaking to you.

Zoe Hart: George just thinks he's mad at me. He needs someone today. Someone who understands what he's going through.

Lavon Hayes: You're not trying to use this to your advantage?

Zoe Hart: I am a doctor, which is why I am bringing him this soup, homemade by me.

Lavon Hayes: Uh-huh. And what's this now?

Zoe Hart: I had to use a can opener. That counts.

Lavon Hayes: Not in the South it doesn't.

[Scene shifts to Town Square, just outside George's office]

Lemon Breeland: I should have known. Thirty seconds after George found out, you'd make your move.

Zoe Hart: I didn't make my move, I made soup.

Lemon Breeland: Listen to me, little Miss Opportunistic, George may be angry at me but he will forgive me, and in a couple of weeks, we will be standing in that church, and we will be saying our vows,and then we will be dancing to "What a Wonderful World" in front of our two hundred closest friends. And nothing and nobody is gonna stop it.

Zoe Hart: Lemon, I'm simply here because my friend George is in pain. He needs someone to talk to. Someone who didn't break his heart.

Man: Hey George!

George Tucker: Ladies, hi. Lemon, did you make that cake for me? How thoughtful of you. And Zoe, is that...is that soup? How sweet. Well, you know what, ladies? I'll see you two later. Thanks for the grub.

[Scene shifts to Mayor's Plantation]

Zoe Hart: It was so weird. George Tucker was happy. Elated, even. It didn't even seem like he was angry at me anymore. He is obviously in denial, which is stage one in the five stages of grief.

Lavon Hayes: Yes, Zoe, even I, the stupid football jock, knows what denial is.

Zoe Hart: Sorry, I just...I've never seen a case this bad. He needs to deal with his feelings. I have to figure out a way how to help him move on to stage two- anger- before he snaps.

Lavon Hayes: And you're researching how on a computer? Aren't you supposed to be a doctor?

Zoe Hart: Psych was not my best rotation. My thesis, 'Get Over It', wasn't well received.

Lavon Hayes: Can't imagine why.

Zoe Hart: The Internet is no help. It is telling me to let him be. It's unaware of the danger.

Lavon Hayes: Which is?

Zoe Hart: Which is he denies himself right down the aisle with a woman who cheated on him.

Lavon Hayes: I see. Zoe? Maybe you should just let this go.

Zoe Hart: Oh no, I cannot let this go. George's mental health is in jeopardy. I have to get a consult.

[Scene shifts to Gilbert and South-ivan rehearsal.]

Brick Breeland: [Singing.] I am the very model of a modern major general, I've la-la-la-la animal and la-la-la-la Benadryl-

Dash DeWitt: Benadryl, Brick?

Brick Breeland: You know it's just hard for me to- to sing and...with all these distractions.

Dash DeWitt: Alright, alright.

Wanda: Tom, that boat is awesome. Will you pass the white paint?

Tom Long: The white paint? Uh, uh. Sure, I'd...okay.

George Tucker: Hey, Tom, buddy. Sweet tea?

Tom Long: Yeah.

George Tucker: Wanda?

Wanda: Me? Yeah.

Dash DeWitt: Brick, the performance is tomorrow.

Brick Breeland: You should have given me these lyrics, like- like a month ago.

Dash DeWitt: Well I did!

George Tucker: Sweet tea, anyone? Hello, Lemon, would you like some sweet tea?

Lemon Breeland: No, I do not want a sweet tea. What the hell is going on?

George Tucker: Well, I believe that we are at rehearsal for Dash's revue, and we are scheduled to sing "I Am the Pirate King".

Lemon Breeland: Did something happen to you? Are you okay?

George Tucker: I'm fantastic.

Lemon Breeland: But you...you do remember what happened last night?

George Tucker: Oh, of course I remember. Something like that's hard to forget.

Dash DeWitt: Alright, Brick. Come on, next up is "Three Little Maids from School". [AnnaBeth and Crickett enter the stage.] I am missing one little maid!

George Tucker: Lemon? I think you're needed on stage for rehearsal. Whose got a paintbrush for me?

[Scene shifts to the Rammer Jammer.]

Wade Kinsella: Hey, uh, Shelley, did you happen to see me leave here last night with anyone?

Shelley Ng: You were drunk and flirting with every girl in here. Could've been anyone.

Wade Kinsella: You have any guesses?

[Woman slaps Wade.]

Shelley Ng: I guess her!

Wade Kinsella: What'd you do that for?

Woman: For calling me all drunk for sex last night.

Wade Kinsella: Oh. Sorry...here.

Woman: Like I would ever wear that.

Wade Kinsella: So we didn't...?

Woman: Of course not! I turned you down. 'Cause you'd already called my married sister, you pig!

Shelley Ng: Classy, Wade. Super classy!

Old Lady #2/Delma Warner: I wondered when you was gonna give me that shirt back.

Wade Kinsella: This is not yours.

Old Lady #2/Delma Warner: It's my sister's.

Wade Kinsella: Big Ethel?

Old Lady #2/Delma Warner: I saw you when you snatched it from my clothesline.

Wade Kinsella: Well...why-why would I do that?

Old Lady #2/Delma Warner: Maybe 'cause you was walking around naked as the day is long.

Shelley Ng: And you just keep getting classier!

[Scene shifts to medical practice.]

Brick Breeland: "About binomial theorem, I am teeming with a lot o' news, with many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse." Dear God. Yeah? Hi.

Zoe Hart: Hey. Brick, have you ever dealt with a patient who was stuck in serious denial?

Brick Breeland: First let me relish the moment. You've finally come to me for a consult!

Zoe Hart: Okay, okay, can we please get on with it?

Brick Breeland: No, I'm still relishing.

Zoe Hart: Brick!

Brick Breeland: Oh, okay, okay. Well, you know, a-a little short-term denial is a perfectly, uh, heathy coping mechanism.

Zoe Hart: Not in this case. See, this guy just found out something terrible about his fi...wife. His wife.

Brick Breeland: Oh, I see, I see, mm-hmm. Did Lemon put you up to this?

Zoe Hart: What?

Brick Breeland: Dr. Hart, I am processing the information about my wife in my own time, thank you very much, and it is perfectly in reason for me to attend my own daughter's wedding without a date.

Zoe Hart: But I-

Brick Breeland: Now if you will excuse me, I have lines to learn. "I'm very good at integeral and differential calculus. I...I know the scientific names of beings animalculous." Yes! yes, that's good, that's good.

[Scene shifts to Gilert and South-ivan rehearsal.]

AnnaBeth Nass, Crickett, Lemon Breeland: "Three little maids, who, all unwary, come from a ladies' Seminary, freed from its genius tutelary. Three little maids from school. Three little maids from school."

Wanda: Wow. They're just lovely, aren't they, Tom?

Tom Long: Uh, uh...yes?

Wanda: Do you sing?

Tom Long: Well...I...

George Tucker: He's incredible. Have you never heard him in the church choir? Really fantastic voice. You know what? I think I'm gonna go get some more paint.

George Tucker: Thank you, sir. Oh, hey, Lemon- great rehearsal. You were really hitting those high notes.

Lemon Breeland: Stop it.

George Tucker: Stop what? I thought I was being perfectly friendly.

Lemon Breeland: Don't be friendly, George. Friendly is...insane, okay? i hurt you, i bertrayed you, so just yell at me or scream at me or something. Please.

George Tucker: There's no need for that. I get it- you had an affair, and I'm sure that you are very, very sorry.

Lemon Breeland: I am so sorry. I am so, so, so, so sorry.

George Tucker: Like I said, I am sure you are.

Lemon Breeland: So does this mean that there's still hope for the wedding to be on?

George Tucker: Not even an iota.

Dash DeWitt: Lemon! George! Come on, you're up!

George Tucker: You know what? I don't feel much like rehearsing, and I got my part down pat, so I'll just see you at the big show tomorrow, okay?

Dash DeWitt: What?

[Scene shifts to Town Square.]

Zoe Hart: Hey.

George Tucker: Hey, Zoe.

Zoe Hart: Hi, George. Hey, are we okay?

George Tucker: Of course we are. Look...I wanna say I'm sorry for taking it all out on you last night. I know that you were just trying to do what's best. And, you know, you're a really good friend and I just want to tell you that.

Zoe Hart: I am glad you think so, pal. Hey, I was hoping you might want to watch a movie with me.

George Tucker: Oh yeah?

Zoe Hart: Yeah. I got, um, Unfaithful, Fatal Attraction, Obsessed...

George Tucker: Zoe.

Zoe Hart: Look, George, I don't want to alarm you. All of that happiness you feel is really major denial.

George Tucker: It's not denial. And this happiness I feel...it's relief. See, I've been walking around for six months wondering why my fiance was acting all nutty and erratic and now that I get it, why, I feel...I feel free.

Zoe Hart: Free?

George Tucker: Yeah. I get to start over- now, while I am still young and vibrant, and let's face it, kind of cute.

Zoe Hart: Alright, look George, you need to process.

George Tucker: No no, no processing. See, what I need to do...is live. Turns out Lemon wasn't the girl for me. She wasn't my destiny. So now it's my job to go find out what, or who, that destiny is.

Zoe Hart: Well, I guess that makes sense.

George Tucker: So, Zoe Hart...I hope to see you around again...really soon.

Scene shifts to Breeland House.]

Brick Breeland: "From Marathon to Timbuktu" and something "oratorical"...Yeah? That's it?

Magnolia Breeland: Oh, Daddy, not even close.

Brick Breeland: If this were not charity, I would quit it...right now. Are you okay, Lemon? You look kind of pale.

Lemon Breeland: No.

Magnolia Breeland: Oh...it's all those ridiculous hats she wears. She never gets any sun.

Lemon Breeland: I'm fine. I'm fine, Daddy.

Brick Breeland: You stay healthy- you know, this is a big month for you.

Lemon Breeland: It is.

Magnolia Breeland: You should really tell him.

Lemon Breeland: Oh, no, there's no need to. George and I are going to make it through. I have a new plan.

Magnolia Breeland: What?

Lemon Breeland: At the end of our Gilbert and Sullivan song, I am gonna kiss him, right there up on stage.

Magnolia Breeland: And what?

Lemon Breeland: He'll get furious, and fury will lead to a fight, and a fight will lead him to let out his feelings, his anger, and we'll talk through it, and then we'll live happily, happily, happily, happily ever after.

Magnolia Breeland: We really need to get a shrink in this town.

[Scene shifts to Mayor's Plantation.]

Selectwoman Blackwell: And if the girls club's gonna have it's bake sale on Wednesday, we'll need to change the trash pickup.

[Wade enters and throws himself on the couch.]

Lavon Hayes: Uh...Selectwoman Blackwell, it has been a treat. And, uh, I will get back to you on all those issues...promptly.

Selectwoman Blackwell: Thank you, Mayor Hayes.

Lavon Hayes: Thank you for coming. All right. You have a good old day. [To Wade.] What is wrong with you?

Wade Kinsella: So very....very much. The shirt...was Ethel Warner's.

Lavon Hayes: No...no, no.

Wade Kinsella: No, no, no, no. I... Apparently, I stole it off her clothesline.

Lavon Hayes: Well, why'd you do that?

Wade Kinsella: Because I was naked. And I have no idea what happened to my clothes. Or where my car is. Or why my arm is so damn itchy.

Lavon Hayes: That's a clue. Well, maybe- maybe it's an allergy. What are you allergic to?

Wade Kinsella: Uh, pumpkins, birch beer, rabbits. Pumpkin season's over, and I stay way the hell away from birch beer. Only person I know with a pet rabbit is... Oh, dear God.

Lavon Hayes: What?

Wade Kinsella: I know exactly who I was with last night. And I only wish it was Big Ethel, 'cause this is...oh, this is so much worse.

Lavon Hayes: Well, who could be worse than Big Ethel?

Wade Kinsella: Tansy.

Lavon Hayes: Your ex-wife.

Wade Kinsella: My ex-wife who's still in love with me. God, I am such a jerk.

[Scene shifts to Town Square.]

Zoe Hart: So I see, you're not in denial, you're in an erectile dysfunction ad.

George Tucker: Oh-ho.

Zoe Hart: What is going on?

George Tucker: Just realized that I'd been part of an us for so long that I'd lost sight of me so I stayed up all night and I made of list of things, that, uh, that I want to do.

Zoe Hart: And one was dying in a motorcycle accident?

George Tucker: No, no. No, 'cause I have a helmet, Doctor.

Zoe Hart: Oh, good. What else is on this list?

George Tucker: Oh, so much. So much. A couple of years ago, Lemon and I went to New Orleans, and I saw this little place, Bar Moreau. It had this incredible old-time jazz band, it was decked out, the place was amazing. I wanted to go in, but Lemon wanted to go to the opera. So...I'm going there now.

Zoe Hart: Aren't you supposed to be in Dash's revue tonight?

Lemon Breeland: Also something that Lemon wanted to do, not me. And I'm not doing things I don't want to do anymore. It is George Tucker time.

Zoe Hart: Okay. You have fun.

George Tucker: Oh, I will.

Zoe Hart: Okay.

George Tucker: You have fun here.

Zoe Hart: Oh, thanks. Don't die.

[Scene shifts to the Rammer Jammer.]

Wade Kinsella: Hey Tansy.

Tansy Kinsella: Hey.

Wade Kinsella: Thank you...for bringing my car back.

Tansy Kinsella It's the least I could do.

Wade Kinsella: And I'm sorry for, uh...you know...having drunk sex with you last night.

Tansy Kinsella: Is that what you think happened? Well, you were drunk, but we did not have sex.

Wade Kinsella: We didn't?

Tansy Kinsella: Oh, you wanted to. You even took off your clothes to prove how much. But last time I saw you, you gave me a speech about making better choices, and you were right. Which is why I kicked you out. Guess you were to drunk to figure out how to put your clothes back on.

Wade Kinsella: Well, thank you for having some good sense. At least one of us does.

Tansy Kinsella: I'm trying. Actually, I'm going to night school, studying cosmetology.

Wade Kinsella: Hey, alright!

Tansy Kinsella: And I am steering clear of men for now. I'm getting my life together, and it's all because of you being so terrible to me. So thanks. I should grab a cab.

Wade Kinsella: Yeah.

Tansy Kinsella: I have to study.

[Scene shifts to medical practice exam room.]

Zoe Hart: Well, it's not broken, just a bad bruise. You are lucky.

Wanda: I got distracted while I was hammering. I know I should've been looking at what I was doing, it's just...I kinda have a crush on someone.

Zoe Hart: Anyone I know?

Wanda: Do you know Tom Long?

Zoe Hart: Tom...Long? You have a crush on Tom Long?

Wanda: Who wouldn't? He's sweet and funny and handsome and good to his mama. He's just so shy.

[Cell phone rings.]

Zoe Hart: Hold that thought. Hello?

George Tucker: [On phone.] Zoe Hart? I just wanted to call and tell you that you are missing out, because New Orleans is amazing. I mean, it's alive, it's electric And the food! I'm eating this beignet right now, and I swear to you, it is a religious experience.

Zoe Hart: Well, I am glad you are having fun.

George Tucker: [On phone.] You know, you should come join me.

Zoe Hart: W-what?


George Tucker: [On phone.] New Orleans is like two hours away. You come out here, we'll hang out, we'll uh, hear some jazz. And then you'll be home by 1:00 AM, 2:00 at the latest.

Zoe Hart: I don't know.

George Tucker: [On phone.] Oh, come on. Doc, hey. You need to get yourself out of that stuffy office. You need to live a little. You need to seize the day, Zoe Hart. Seize the Day!

Zoe Hart: I'll think about it.

George Tucker: [On phone.] You do that. You think about that real hard. Okay?

Zoe Hart: Bye.

Wanda: So what do you think? What should I do about Tom Long?

Zoe Hart: I think you should go for it.

Wanda: Really?

Zoe Hart: Sometimes destiny gives us a window, and no matter how crazy it may seem, you have to act on it before that window closes. I have to go.

[Scene shifts to Dash's Gilbert and South-ivan Revue.]

Magnolia Breeland: I just want to let you know that George still isn't here.

Lemon Breeland: He's not?

Magnolia Breeland: Mm-mmm.

Lemon Breeland: That's okay. He will be. I'm not worried.

Dash DeWitt: First up is "Three Little Maids", and for me, two little ear plugs. Come on.

Lemon Breeland: Magnolia, you get him here, okay? Everything depends on this. Everything.

Magnolia Breeland: Okay.

Lemon Breeland: Thank you. Okay, Go, go, go.

[Scene shifts to Mayor's Plantation.]

Zoe Hart: Lavon! Lavon, I need to borrow your car and some cash for emergencies, and directions to New Orleans.

Lavon Hayes: And why are you going to New Orleans?

Zoe Hart: To meet George.

Lavon Hayes: Dangerous territory, Zoe. Very dangerous.

Zoe Hart: But what if George is my destiny, and this is my only chance?

Lavon Hayes: Let me remind you of one thing. George did not choose you. He found out a secret about Lemon. Big difference.

[Scene shifts to Dash's Gilbert and South-ivan Revue.]

Brick Breeland: "I am the very model of a modern major general, I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral, I know the kings of England and I quote the fights historical, from Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical...

Lemon Breeland]: Did you find him yet?

Magnolia Breeland: He's not at home or his office.

Dash DeWitt: Lemon, where is George? He's supposed to be getting into his costume!

Lemon Breeland: Oh! Um, I forgot to tell you. Uh, George is very, very, very sick. He has, um, a terrible stomach bug. He's at home.

Tom Long: Weird. I saw him this morning riding his new motorcycle.

Lemon Breeland: A motorcycle? No, that's crazy.

Tom Long: Don't worry, he was with Dr. Hart. I'm sure he insisted he wear his helmet.

Lemon Breeland: Dr. Hart? I'll be right back!

Dash DeWitt: What? But you're up in two songs!

[Scene shifts to New Orleans, Bar Moreau.]

George Tucker: "Jambalaya and a crawfish pie and fil gumbo, 'cause tonight I'm gonna see ma cher amie, oh. Pick guitar, fill fruit jar and be gay, oh. Son of a gun, we're gonna have big fun on the bayou. Thibodeaux and Fontainenot, the place is buzzin'. Kinfolk come to see Yvonne by the dozen. Dress in style and go hog wild, me oh, my oh. Son of a gun, we're gonna have big fun on the bayou. Jambalaya and a crawfish pie and fil gumbo, 'cause tonight I'm gonna see ma cher amie, oh. Pick guitar, fill fruit jar and be gay, oh. Son of a gun, we're gonna have big fun on the bayou. Son of a gun, we're gonna have big fun on the bayou. Son of a gun, we're gonna have big fun on the bayou." Whew!

Man: Great job.

Man: You sounded great, good job.

George Tucker: Thank you, sir.

Zoe Hart: I did not know that you could sing like that.

George Tucker: Well, there are a lot of things you don't know about me, Zoe Hart.

Zoe Hart: I guess so.

George Tucker: But I'm really glad you came. 'Cause now you help me with the next thing on my to-do list. Bartender, two Hurricanes, please.

Woman: I'm sorry to interrupt, but you were great up there.

George Tucker: Oh, thank you.

Woman: Can we see you perform anywhere else in town?

George Tucker: Um, sorry, that was actually just kind of a spontaneous thing, so...

Kim Charlton: Oh.

Pablo Charlton: But you are a professional singer?

[Zoe laughs.]

George Tucker: No. [To Zoe.] Really? [To couple.] Actually, I'm a lwyer.

Pablo Charlton: You hear that, honey? We're groupies for a lawyer.

Zoe Hart: Oh, don't be embarrassed. You're not the first groupies that this lawyer has had.

Pablo Charlton: Kim and Pablo Charlton.

George Tucker: Um, George Tucker.

Zoe Hart: Hi, I'm Zoe.

Pablo Charlton: You two from around here?

Zoe Hart: No, we're just visiting.

Kim Charlton: Oh, so are we. From New Jersey. Actually, we're on our honeymoon.

George Tucker: Oh, well congratulations. And that is such a coincidence, because so are we.

[Scene shifts to Dash's Gilbert and South-ivan Revue.]

AnnaBeth Nass: "I'm called Little Buttercup, dear Little Buttercup, though I could never tell why...

Brick Breeland: Did you hear? I got all the words right! Every single one! Where's Lemon?

Magnolia Breeland: Um...not really sure.

Dash DeWitt: We are going to have to skip their number!

Wanda: Tom and I can fill in! Oh, he can sing. He's in the choir. We can do it!

Tom Long: ...what?

Wanda: Come on, Tom! Seize the day!

Tom Long: Okay, we can do it.

[Scene shifts to Tom and Wanda on stage.]

Tom Long: "Oh, better far to live and die under the brave black flag I fly..."

Wanda: "...than play a sanctimonious part with a pirate head and a pirate heart."

Tom Long: "Away to the cheating world go you..."

Wanda: "...where pirates are all well-to-do."

Tom Long: "But I'll be true to the song I sing, and live and die a Pirate King. For I am the Pirate King, and it is, it is a glorious thing to be a Pirate King. For I am a Pirate King."

Wanda: "You are, hurrah for the Pirate King!"

Tom Long: "And it is, it is a glorious thing..."

Brick Breeland: Where are Lemon and George? It's not like them to- to blow off an important talent event and to miss my song.

Magnolia Breeland: Daddy, I have to tell you something.

Tom Long and Wanda: "Hurrah for the Pirate Kind, hurrah for the Pirate King!"

[Scene shifts to New Orleans, Bar Moreau.]

Kim Charlton: So you don't live anywhere?

George Tucker: No, right now, nothing's holding us down. We're just kind of, untethered, free. You know, so we decided to take a year off and travel...

Zoe Hart: Yeah.

George Tucker: ...and see where life takes us.

Zoe Hart: Yeah, well we've been all over. To Australia...

George Tucker: Oh, yeah.

Zoe Hart: ...Europe...

Pablo Charlton: Wow, so what's next?

George Tucker: Uh, what's next on the honeymoon is Uganda, actually.

Zoe Hart: I have always wanted to go to Uganda! To see the gorillas in the wild.

George Tucker: Me, too.

Kim Charlton: You two lead such an amazing life.

Zoe Hart: We really do.

Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen...we have a special guest performer tonight. Please give a warm New Orleans welcome to Mr. Scotty McCreery.

Kim Charlton: Scotty McCreery, holy crap!

George Tucker: If you'll excuses us, I, uh...I'm gonna go dance with my bride.

Kim Charlton: Bye.

George Tucker: Come on.

[Scotty McCreery sings "The Trouble With Girls".]

George Tucker: I should have known that we would have so much in common. Zoe Hart, from the first day I picked you up by the side of the road, you have gotten to me.

Zoe Hart: It's been a great night. Do you have anything left on your list that you want to do?

George Tucker: You know, I've done everything on my list. Except one.

Zoe Hart: So, what now?

George Tucker: Now...now we spend the night. And be who we just pretended we were, live our lives. Seize the day.

Zoe Hart: You're right, we should.

George Tucker: We should.Yeah. I'll get us a room, then.

Zoe Hart: My mom knows somebody at every fancy hotel in America. So, why don't you let me make the call?

[Scene shifts to the carriage house, Zoe's home.]

Lemon Breeland: George! George, are you in there? George?

Brick Breeland: Lemon?

Lemon Breeland: Hi, Daddy. Um...I was just, um...I was just checking to see if Zoe Hart had my wallet, because I lost it, and somebody said that she might have it. And I-I need to find it because it's really important.

Brick Breeland: Honey, Magnolia told me George broke off the wedding. What's going on?

Lemon Breeland: I messed up real bad. I messed up so bad, Daddy. I cheated on George.

[Scene shifts to the Rammer Jammer.]

Wade Kinsella: Oh. Hey, Tom.

Tom Long: So, I hear you solved the mystery.

Wade Kinsella: Yeah. Yeah, I did.

Tom Long: I'm sorry I couldn't be there to lend a hand, but I had a big night. I was so scared, but...I sang.

Wade Kinsella: Hey. Hey, that's great.

Tom Long: It was incredible. Up there on that stage with Wanda, it felt like everything was right. It felt like, uh, destiny.

Wade Kinsella: Destiny, huh?

Tom Long: I've been pining away for Zoe Hart for so long, I nearly missed Wanda.

Wade Kinsella: Well, good for you. You know, I'm, uh...I'm glad you found someone.

Tom Long: Our life as wild bachelors was incredible, but it's time to grow up. I'm nearly 23. I'm sorry, Wade...but good-bye.

Wade Kinsella: All right, Tom.

Wade Kinsella: [On phone.] Hey, Tansy, it's, uh...it's Wade.

[Scene shifts to New Orleans, Bar Moreau.]

Zoe Hart: Pierre, a suite would be perfect. Thank you so much. Okay, bye.

[Singer beings to perform "What a Wonderful World".]

Zoe Hart: Your wedding song.

George Tucker: It just took my by surprise, that's all.

Zoe Hart: George...I think it's time to go home.

[Scene shifts to the Rammer Jammer.]

Wade Kinsella: Wow! Nice hair.

Tansy Kinsella: Very funny. We have to practice on each other in class, and my partner went a little overboard.

Wade Kinsella: No, no. It, uh...it looks good. Thank you for, uh...for coming by.

Tansy Kinsella: You're my only ex-husband. When you need me, I'm here. What's going on?

Wade Kinsella: Well, you know I was, I was just thinking about what you said, about, uh...you know, about how you're trying to change and- and do better, and, uh....well, it got me thinking. Getting drunk, going home with random women, losing my clothes...I'm trying to put that behind me, too.

Tansy Kinsella: Is that so?

Wade Kinsella: Obviously, I'm...I'm not doing perfectly. But, uh, I got a plan. I'm saving up money to open my own bar. I think it could be a pretty special place.

Tansy Kinsella: Is that why you called me? To tell me you're saving up for a bar?

Wade Kinsella: I guess I just wanted you to know that, uh...well, I'm- I'm trying, too.

Tansy Kinsella: Well, it's about time, Wade Kinsella.

[Scene shifts to just outside Town Square.]

George Tucker: Zoe, thank you...for everything. This night was magical. But...

Zoe Hart: When the magic wears off, reality will still be here. And you have to deal with it.

George Tucker: Yeah.

Zoe Hart: I'll see you tomorrow.

Lavon Hayes: Hey, George.

[George punches Lavon.]

Lavon Hayes: Okay, I- I...I did feel that.

[Scene shifts to the Breeland house.]

Lemon Breeland: I'm sorry, Daddy. You must be so disappointed in me.

Brick Breeland: No. We all make mistakes. All of us do. It's okay.

Lemon Breeland: Do you think George...is gonna come back?

Brick Breeland: I don't know. Tell you what I do know. Unlike your dear old dad, you...are resilient. No matter what happens, you will go on. That much I do know.

Magnolia Breeland: I can't sleep. Is everything okay?

Brick Breeland: Hey, Magpie, why don't you go on back to bed? You know? I mean, you got school tomorrow.

Magnolia Breeland: I want to help. What can I do?

Lemon Breeland: Um, you can, um...make a list of all the people that we need to call to tell them that the wedding is off.

Magnolia Breeland: Okay, but don't make me call Aunt Lavinia.

[George knocks on door.]

Lemon Breeland: George, where have you been? Are you okay?

George Tucker How could you do that, Lemon? How could you do that to me? How could you do that to us? I loved you, Lemon. So no, I am not okay. I am hurt, and I am...I am angry!

Lemon Breeland: I know. I know.

[Scene shifts to kitchen of the Mayor's Plantation.]

Lavon Hayes: So, how was New Orleans?

Zoe Hart: I had a perfect night. Well, almost perfect. But you were right. It's too soon for George to start a new relationship. So I'm glad we came home before we both did something we'd regret.

Lavon Hayes: You seem oddly, uh...what is that look on your face?

Zoe Hart: Hope. Because now I know that George and I would be...that we could be great together.

Lavon Hayes: Wow. I really hope everything works out for you. I do.

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